Here's What Happens:

You get rocked, you get beaten, you get weary.You get blessed, you get raised, you get confident.

You get blocked, you get stopped, you get sad.

You get punched, you get slapped, you get kicked.

You make a sale, you miss a sale.

You pay a bill, you don't pay a bill.

Your heart beats, but it stops for a second in between.

Your teeth fall apart, your eyes get gouged out, your car explodes.

Your heart breaks, your wife is hurt, your baby won't sleep.

You act like a jerk, you are cold and heartless.

You forget about important things and waste your time on crap.

You are worried.


And uncertain.

You are hopeful, but not really.

But really, you are.


You jump out of a plane 1,000 times and your parachute works every time, but sooner or later, you start to wonder if you've cheated death too many times. After all, a parachute is just a man-made thing that isn't fool proof, and you are still plummeting towards the Earth, just a little bit slower.

I understand that all of this is necessary to make faith and confidence even stronger than before, and so I welcome it, but that doesn't make it any easier to deal with. If it was easy to deal with, it wouldn't really by a test at all. If your confidence is at, say, level 20, and your faith is at level 15, then the only way for them to be increased is to increase the pressure.

If you can barely lift 100 pounds, can you also barely lift 101 pounds? 102? 105? What's the breaking point? How will you ever know if you can lift 200 pounds if it is never thrown down on you? Maybe you can.

I think it is possible that God is working to shape me into the most confident and faithful person who ever lived, but as they say: its a tough row to hoe.

Oh well, whatever.

How can I ever say that I've lived a full life if I just keep avoiding things?

Let's have it.

I'll take it.